Politically Correct Bedtime Stories

Politically Correct Bedtime Stories by James Finn Garner

Looking for diversity? Looking for stories that promote social justice, show equality of the sexes and give witches and goblins awareness of their cultural identity as well as examines the history of inclusion and exclusion of the social classes? This could be it, for these stories are filled with pearls of information to put into your social conscientiousness about such important topics as gender, race, religion, ethnicity, sexuality, disabilities, and culture.

No doubt, some would fail to see the humor in such "politically correct" tales, but in such a day as we now live if you didn't laugh you would cry, and George and I laughed our way through most of these short stories. It was great because we are familiar of course with the original tales and seeing them in a NEW AGE light, made them quite humorous, not only that, they were short, so that made them enjoyable too. Keep in mind, these are tainted versions of the originals, and in fact, they are what I would consider to be adult versions of the once beloved children's tales and not for children at all, (and I will even admit to have skipped reading a couple that I found too offensive,) but the diversion of turning the sickness of political correctness into humor drew me to read most of them just the same.

In Goldielocks, for example, the bears are noted as a traditional nuclear family, defined as one that enslaves womyn and generally imprints rigid notions of heterosexual roles unto the next generation. Note: womyn is a politically correct spelling of women and used throughout the book. There are many alternative spellings, including "womon" and "womin". The term has been used in modern times tied to the concept of feminism, as a form of the word without the connotations of a patriarchal society aka the word "men" in the word.) Anyhow Mama bear and Papa bear are politically correct, although traditionally nuclear, and have avoided these traditional pitfalls. they have given their offspring, the non gender specific name of 'baby.'

As the story goes they sit down to breakfast and go for a walk.... when lo and behold, Goldielocks, a maverick biologist who has been spying on the bears for days enters their cottage. Her intent, of course, is to put radio collars on the bears so that they can be tracked. Goldie puts tranquilizer in their porridge and snares under the pillows of their beds, thinking of course, that to do such research on these bears will make her famous.

Suspicious of the chemical scent in their porridge, the bears don't eat it when they get back from their walk, instead they go upstairs to their bedroom and there they spy the snares with the radio collars under their pillows. They are wise bears and cannot be so easily fooled you see.

Papa bear mauls the biologist and they eat her, even though they are vegetarians, but at the end we see how even though they are avowed vegetarians, they are "always ready to try new things," because "flexibility is just one more benefit of being multicultural."

The author lives in Chicago with his spousal life mate and their new pre-adult. He has written several "processed tree carcasses" ... (aka books) I have read Once Upon a More Enlightened Time, a book of tales of the same genre. I found it quite fascinating to read his humor and enlightening to take a peek into the world of political correctness that I really am quite unaware of,one that living in Chicago, being a writer and entertainer and all he has no doubt encountered. I liked his sense of humor and am proud that he would dare to use the terms like womyn, even though he would no doubt be taken less seriously and credibly by serious academics and common people alike.

Yes, as sick humor as it was, and as sadly true as it all is, he made me laugh, which I thought was rather funny, considering that I am, of course, part of the more traditional family unit.. neither homophobic nor feminist, simply Christian.

As a Christian woman, I am not afraid to say I am woman. I have no conscious or subconscious need to change the spelling of the word that identifies me. I am quite happy with my gender too. I have no inward need to change my gender, or act out another role in hopes of feeling better about myself. I also do not have to appeased the expectations of my peergroup in order to fit in, you know be homogeneous, a clone of the world.

I am essentially not very politically correct. I am a homeschooling mom though, which is probably why I found these bedtime stories somewhat educational and a bit humorous.. Perhaps they are even a little too honest of a reflection of our adult modern culture, life and times.